marley

maybe moaning is the sound of the heart.
maybe im tired of this headache.
maybe forced thoughts are the only ones never to be thought.
maybe if my heart could feel my thoughts this would work.
maybe if my hands would move to the beat of my heart i could pay for my sins.
maybe im actually happy, if i only knew it.
maybe this time im doin it right.
maybe this new year i could find some resolution.
maybe. baby. rhymes.

mario and rubiks cube....oh yeah

This pixel-art Super Mario is made from cunningly twisted Rubik's Cubes, arranged and stacked by Invader, the legendary public artist. Link (via Wonderland

its that time again.

Jones is doin there holiday pack again.

national flavors available at target, im goin to get a pack this weekend, anyone want some give me a call.

National Flavors include:
Brussels Sprout with Prosciutto, Cranberry Sauce, Turkey & Gravy, Wild Herb Stuffing, and Pumpkin Pie.
Also included: Serving spoon, moistened towelette, and wine list.

Regional Flavors:
Broccoli Casserole, Smoked Salmon Paté , Turkey & Gravy, Corn on the Cob, and Pecan Pie.
Also included: Serving spoon, moistened towelette.


Yes this year they have released a new flavor for there regional packed...............SALMON!!!
When asked the owner of the company said "i cant finish a bottle. i just cant"
all proceeds go to charity and such.....and now to squeeze in some irrelevant personal lyrics.

"Work ourselves, fingers to the bone
Suck the marrow, drain my soul
Fingers to the bone
Pay your dues, and your debts
Pay your respects, everybody tells you
You pay for what you get
You pay for what you get

Everybody asks me how she's doin'
Has she really lost her mind?
I said, I couldn't tell you
I've lost mine

Words, words, words, have you heard
A bird in hand is much better than,
Any number free to wander
Fly away... Stay
You pay for what you get
You pay for what you get

Everybody asks me how she's doing
Is she really all she says...
Everybody asks me how she's doing
Since she went away
I said I couldn't tell you
I'm OK I'm OK (I'm OK)

Surprise, surprise
You pay for what you get
You pay for what you get

Everybody asks me how she's doing
Has she really lost her...
Everybody asks me how she's doing
Since she went away
I said I couldn't tell you
I'm OK I'm OK I'm OK (How are you?)

Pay for what you get
Pay for what you get...oh...
Pay for what you get
Pay for what you get oh...
Oh...
"

happy holidays.

lyger lyger burning bright.....

William Blake....its like a happy place for the soul.

dali.....check out the pic, if that dont get u the title will.

the transparent simulacrum of the feigned image (if u dont have a detailed understanding of the title look up some of the words....cause thats bad ass.....simulacrum is my new word of the week....thanks billy corigan.)

anyways here's

The Transparent Simulacrum of The Feigned Image

2010 tech come to me soon

Japanese company claims fibre-optic data transfer record
A Japanese company has developed technology to transmit a two-hour movie in 0.5 seconds, the world's fastest speed achieved with fibre-optic cables in the field, it says.
Kansai Electric used fibre-optic cables on power-transmitting steel towers to achieve the speed of one terabit per second, which is more than 100 times faster than inter-city data transmissions currently in use, a spokesman says.
The company, Japan's second-largest power supplier, has not decided when to put the technology into practical use but says it is possible that it would come in 2010 or later

i promise this is the last time i post someone elses lyrics.

okay so yeah, lyric posting is over played, and no one ever actually reads them i get it.
but ive been playing this song over and over for about an hour. (i have headphones on so no one else has to be tortured. anywho the song is making me feel damn good and happy. if anyone wants to see how im doing, then please go to yahoo music and watch this video. its very apt for alot.

Death Cab For Cutie 'title and registration'

"the glove compartment isn't accurately named
and everybody knows it.
so i'm proposing a swift orderly change.

cause behind its door there's nothing to keep my fingers warm
and all i find are souvenirs from better times
before the gleam of your taillights fading east
to find yourself a better life.

i was searching for some legal document
as the rain beat down on the hood
when i stumbled upon pictures i tried to forget
and that's how this idea was drilled into my head

cause it's too important
to stay the way it's been

there's no blame for how our love did slowly fade
and now that it's gone it's like it wasn't there at all
and here i rest where disappointment and regret collide
lying awake at night

there's no blame for how our love did slowly fade
and now that it's gone it's like it wasn't there at all
and here i rest where disappointment and regret collide
lying awake at night (up all night)
when i'm lying awake at night."

just good stuff

better than the world

"too much coffee and cigarettes,
thats okay there special blend,
i swear i dont always smoke this much.
i wish that wasn't a lie.
i'll be doin real fine.
fine." -M.E.H.

sometimes a friend just encourages u.
no weight.
no fear.
just a smile, some memories and a new beginning.
thanks.

im pretty sure everyone has heard.

im assuming everyone knows by now, i am home, i am hiding, i am a poof cactus across the table of life. odds are if ur reading this i would love to see u, but prob just in private. but not having to do anything with ur privates. or mine. just to hang.
if ur reading this, i love u, and u have prob been a kick ass good friend.
(isnt blogging sometimes just like a shitty new for of mass mail.)
mass male. tee hee.
yep. im still in 6th grade.
and i will always keep staring.
i could help it then, sure aint gonna help it now.

TeraNover

........he stops for a moment in the pause between laughs
"so how do u just get up and leave everything" she said setting down her third drink looking like it was her 12th.

"oh thats the easy part!" he chuckles. he walks from behind the bar cleaning a few spills of the slobbered Lambs along the way.
"u just get up and walk away."

"well what if u, ur mind changed and u want it back?" she tosses back her drink, the air pausing for a moment while his personal theme music plays through the restaurant.

"oh u dont. u cant. it doesnt work that way. u walk away. keep walkin. u walk away."

she looks a little puzzled with a googly eyed stare, her blue eyes and her odd smile making him question whats going on in her mind.

"so how long u here to?" she says changing the subject in her own "flit of fairy" like way.

"here? like?" the 'to's' and 'at's' making him miss any of the point of a sentence again.

"what time do u get off?' she annunciates grinning at his blank stare.

"uh, prob 6, maybe 8."

"u like workin nights?" tappin the bar for another drink of lambs and green martini.

"don't like workin days. people calm down at night. u get to see who they are, or at least who they'd like to think they are. and i know too well how to handle people with the booze."
chucklin he pours the drink just wishin he could add some extra to get some extra tip.

" reason enough. any other reason?"

He ponders, scratchin his face a little to much, then starin at his nails out of unconcious habit.
"days are about waitin, and pushin and pullin and pretense to make urself what u should seem like u are. make any sense. hell im no philosopher and im talking to much without thinking this through. Im workin don’t ask me this shit. " drinkin an extra coffee just to get that boost.
"mostly its the waitin. days are about, bullshit and cues/que's. I hate cue's/que's."

excerpts 16805 from "a warm celtic corpset." (crappy title, good book.)

meanwhile, many months ago it all changed.....

thats the problem with him, he believes his own myth.

Tavius

i am my beloveds and He loves me as i am.

Ba da ba ba, ba da ba ba

guess what?............i suck.
its my quantity.
a "fallicy" in my quality.
i try to fix it daily, but possibly maybe, i might not be enough to do it surely.
wholisticly i spell like my tendancy for good change.
i do it badly. sincerly im not looking for sympathy,
i take responsibility, for every tragedy that has fallen from me.
but im still not likely to look how anyone wants me to be.
a better man for free? its quite costly and no one has explained the terms of the fee.
this is not poetry.
its a sillioque of 'y' sounding homoneys.
and no i didnt mean harmoney, even though frequently what i say comes out in a quandry of mystery and awefully placed symally.
seriously im not expecting anything easy. i just want some reasonably placed audibly heard converse ability, shared mutually from me to my community. i feel a little uncomfortably about the words that obviously have been spoken about me, but honestly i just want to be happy, to be with my lovely, and my lucky puppy, and a car that works not so poorly.
u may not believe me, but i want her deeply. im gonna work to get her madly. so please dont try to dissuade that so passionatly before u get the chance to see, that im hardly the shit i used to be.
this has been hardly a party, if it looks like i ran away, im sorry, if i havent communticated forgive me, i have not forgotten those who are friendly, those who are silly, those who are trust worthy, or those who are family. my stay maybe untimely for a quick return safely. from now on i will try to speak more openly, i will hold my self steady, i will try to keep from hurtin anybody, and will leave out nobody. partially im truely and sadly afraid. if i can make a man out of a monkey, if i can live up to what is contantly in front of me. what is is my folly is my treachury, to myself, to u, to we.
i never tried to make myself so heavy, physically or emotionally, didnt mean to pull down on those that have given me everything worldy and spirtually that a body could ever give to a person who constatly holds a record for the most exceptionally extrodianarally lengthy ability to be so damn needy. ill stop that quickly and never return to such desparity. there is much work to do and i got the up hill on this dra-medy we call clarity. to see clearly from both sides is gonna take some coffee, some talky, some funny, some ouchy, something touchy and other words that i make up for this bloggitry. hey guys im getting sleepy, and i will continue these thoughts shortly, if u have any thoughts id love some commentary. and i even now make an apology if any of this comes out with a lack of sincerity, it is not done intentionaly, this comes with vagurey, and some generality, im gonna try to call everyone more personally so we can talk freely about whatever needs to be. if that does not happen oftenly im sorry, but celtic hearth and tryin to get money, im makin a priority till i can get home and see all my beautifuly constructed tennesee and the best people to ever hit the scenery. :)
till then good night, love and funny be with thee.

p.s. yep.......i used thee........its cheap.......but its also 6:46 in the mornin.

Hear no evil, See no evil, Speak no Evil

Never hearing Never Seeing Never Understanding.

tastes like cod.

"I wonder where the fish has gone?

You did love it so. You looked after it like a son.

And it went wherever i did go

Is it in the cupboard?

Yes! Yes! No!...

Wouldn't you like to know? It was a lovely little fish.

And it went wherever I did go.

It's behind the sofa!

Where can that fish be?

Have you thought of the drawers in the bureau?!

Shh!

It is a most elusive fish!

And it went wherever I did go.

Ooooh, fishy, fishy, fishy fish!

A-fish, a-fish, a-fish, a-fishy, ooooh.

Ooooh, fishy, fishy, fishy fish!

That went wherever I did go.

Look up his trunk!

Yeah, it's hidden in his trousers!" - monty python

lite bright lite bright.

turn on the magic of colored lights

wth the rodeo clowns, they pick me up when im down.

american dreams in velcro seams.

"

New Orleans Murder Rate Not In Sync With Rest Of Nation

POSTED: 1:56 pm CDT August 18, 2005

NEW ORLEANS -- They point to an experiment last year by university researchers in which police fired 700 blank rounds in a New Orleans neighborhood in a single afternoon.Murder rates have fallen dramatically in many major U.S. cities -- but that's not happening in the Big Easy. Although the murder rate in New Orleans is lower than it was a decade ago, it's rising and is nearly 10 times the national average. A criminologist said the city's trend is the reverse of 46 of the top 50 cities in the United States. Experts said the trend in the city that's home to the popular French Quarter exists for several reasons -- drugs, too few police, inexperienced prosecutors, and residents staying quiet because they fear retaliation. No one called police to report the gunfire"


Outside is america.

they tell u not to look down......what do they know?

im assuming everyone has heard of Julian Beever, he's a mad crazy perspective artist/side walk artist. i found a site with alot of his stuff on here, check him out, its pretty genius.

to be or not to be?

"The majority of people will say that the faces depicted on these photographs are immaculately beautiful. The portraits were made with the help of a special computer program by German psychologists Martin Gruendl, Claus Marberger, Christoph Scherber and Christoph Braun. The researchers designed the images on the base of ideal proportions and features of human face.

Modern people with their standards of beauty run risks of losing the battle with perfect computer images and fall a victim to non-existent perfection. In addition, German scientists concluded that there was a certain stereotype in perceiving a beautiful person. People think that beautiful individuals are talented, creative and sensitive; that they have an ability to exert a positive influence on others. Those, who have not so pretty, or absolutely unpretty faces, are usually perceived as people who cannot boast of such qualities and traits - just an instant visual contact is enough to conclude so. Unattractive people are usually perceived as someone unhappy, malcontent, presumptuous, stupid and exhausted with their own lives.

Social consequences of human appearances are enormous. It is easier for beautiful people to live on this planet. They are usually more successful in their private and professional lives, although it may seem to be absolutely unfair to others"

thats right folks, zeus is back in action

The images below show a japanese aircraft being affected by a lightning flash. To the authors knowledge, nobody on the plane was injured. It is unknown if the aircraft experienced any damage. According to the scientist who acquired this imagery, the airplane itself triggered the lightning discharge.

we can meet at ur location but u better come with cash.

anybody like onions

If we don't end our dependence on oil by 4920, when will we end it? 5580? By then, it may be too late," Bush said.

Responding to reporters' questions, Bush admitted that our progeny could face challenges in pursuit of the goal, such as the earth's degrading orbit and eventual destruction of the moon by tidal force, or the Second Coming of Jesus Christ.

The proclamation comes on the heels of Bush's plans to pay off the national debt by the early 6300s, and win the war on terror by 7450.

-tastes like onions

in retrospect.

wouldnt it be damn cool if words like "retrospect" just meant u looked like the past, instead of looking at it.

u could say look at that man over there, i like his retrospect style. but it would be more than that, like when u wore 80's clothes u would get like that low fi 80's tv camera look to u.......the same with like the 20's u'd go all black and white and have a very low framerate.

man.
retrospect.
that makes me want to be, much more retroactive.

NO ONE EVER EXPECT THE SPANISH INQUISITION!

these lyrics are incredibly suprising.....i randomly came across them today, and they are a bit more morbid and serious, not bad for three sexually ambiguous teens.

"You have so many relationships in this life,
But only one or two will last.
You go through all the pain and strife,
Then you turn your back and they’re gone so fast.

Oh yeah. they’re gone so fast.

Oh, so hold on to the ones who really care,
In the end they’ll be the only ones there.
When you get old and start losing your hair,
Can you tell me who will still care?
Can you tell me who will still care? oh care.

Chorus:

Mmmbop, ba duba dop ba do bop,
Ba duba dop ba do bop,
Ba duba dop ba do. oh yeah,
Mmmbop ba duba dop ba do bop,
Ba duba dop ba do bop,
Ba duba dop ba do

Oh yeah, in an mmmbop they’re gone. yeah.

Plant a seed, plant a flower,
Plant a rose, you can plant any one of those
Keep planting to find out which one grows.
It’s a secret no one knows.
It’s a secret no one knows.
Oh, no one knows.

(repeat chorus twice....)"

oh my life is changin every day.

i may have more family than i once thought....
i have friends.
ill have a license.
i have a dog that i love as much as a child.
i have a computer.
i have a car i can use.
i have a crappy job.
i have a plan.
i have a dream.
i have a gift. given to me, and maybe a few to give.
i have hope.
i have choices to make.
i have made choices.
i have a smoke and a beer.
i have-n't been the best.
i have to start it all.
it all had to stop. and change rearange in a clidiscope of hopes and dreams, to pull at the different seams of ever controling failure. lack of esteem steam cleaned out. it was without doubt the rope to tie my fate to and endless substrate of less than great, no better than good. i just hope u've understood. i didnt mean for the pain, i rarely do, to all of u, friends, country men, thanks for lending me the beer, ive had my drink and am full........sobering up now things are straight. im straight. past irrate, now to pollinate im settin the date to fly into few better trates
ive had a point to contemplate, to fix the circumstance. past first glance, rants or happenstance

oh yeah, i have a chance.

here is a full motown remix

more and genius full motown remix by DjZ-trip.

she got my number i must confess

so get this frickin cool ass thing!!!
its a motown remix of the jackson 5 now for all the white folk on my page, which is prob all of u cept and occasional herb, this might not mean crap to u. but this is the best remix of motown flotown in the spirt of the original i have ever heard. and this song is so over used in hip hop, rock and most genres, but this is bad fuckin ass. i have to give the credit to S.M.Ash for showin this to me, and i am greatful. and so here it is
Black Jackson

here is the story

Okay so google is starting a new search engine.......they want a bunch of people on here so they can charge advertisers alot of money to to advertise on there new engine......but the thing is by searchin u win stuff and u win me stuff if u sign up through this link.....dont have to but im workin my ass of and have no money to spend for fun if i ever want to get back to nashvegas, so free stuff would be cool.............and still most important...........SEND ME PICTURES.

ciou

I'll be lost on a lonely late night

so yes, i am here and happy. actually startin to be very happy. i feel for once in a long time that i can do somethin with my life. I AM FISCALLY POWERFUL!!! or gettin there.

but i am startin to get pretty lonely. so i have a request to my friends.
could u guys start sendin me pictures of whats up. u know my email. just send pics of u, ur dogs, fun stuff, my dog, silly stuff. start takin pics please..........i really need them. id like to see whats goin on..........not much goin on here in the way of people........and its cool cause im havin alot of time to disipline myself.......but i like to see my friends and my home town........so seriously please.
Thanks
Tav

go go gophers

http://www.myspace.com/tavandmary

song

the spanish God of War

i dont remeber this guy in aztec mythology for some reason

tee hee....its a mexican chuck :)

important things to see.

everyone. since u are on the internet this should not be difficult.
search for the Kanye West, Diamonds are Forever video. its is an incredible black and white must see video. if u dont get what its about, please look it up after u see it.

second u must see the Dave video for American Baby (if u dont know who i mean when i just say 'dave', then u shouldnt be reading my blog, cause u have most likely never met me. and that would be just weird.) if u dont feel looking hard for that video, a small screen one is at mtv.com.
kanye's video is not.........might be to harsh.

he's just keepin' it' real.........when keepin it real goes wrong.

i hope u gooooo indian baby!

i love animals.........but o my god this is an ugly monkey.

"A zoo official holds a seven-day old Stump-Tailed macaque at the state zoological park in Gauhati, India, Saturday, July 9, 2005. The macaque lost his mother two days ago. Stump-Tailed is one of the rare species macaque in the world. (AP Photo/ Anupam Nath) "

where the fuck is my neural net!?!?

Most wired cities

nashvegas is 27!
sweet!
not bad at all.

above all time and light

the clouds in reverse
wet thick ocean fog, the sent of salt surrounding me so thick i could only see the grass in front of me
but overhead was blue clear sunny sky
all round me as far as i could see was grey, the clouds were with me
sea gulls flying around me, no where about the fog
and the fog was lit in crystals of sun shine
: blues and greys
i want to cry
green of the grass reflecting up to the lowest parts of the cloudy mist surrounding me
and orange and blue straight above me, shimering beautifully clear
the sun pushing straight apon my head but being let through no were else
beautiful
it was as if i was in the clouds and buildings and structures were up there with me
cars and parking lots set up in the clouds of crystal seagull sparkilng spectum colored fog of clouded resilience

it consumed me and my american smoke, its smoke blew through mine.
fog sun shine salt filled my lungs as i blew mine into the morning, recipricating what i had been giving, breathing back and forth smoke to smoke.
my rebel yell screamed in my stomach, and i wanted to scream in joy.
anything i can if i can look over and see it reflected in ur eyes.

good newfie morning.

and i havent even walked my block.

so. i am a narcissist. and i am curious about what is going on concerning me in nashvegas. so if anyone wants to do me a favor and tell me there thoughts on me......in a short comment sort of way. if they have any suggestions of what i should do with my life, or if im missing something, or whatever. please put it in my comments and lets have a tavius and what he should do conversation on my blog..........i like talkin bout me!

p.s. dont hold back or reword things politely please.
this would really help me......i need it from the people i love and that love me.....which means not junkfruit......who the fuck are u?? dont just comment like u know me......and if u comment make it atleast funny u 17 year old, borrowing ur dads car (okay i dont have a car or one to borrow so ur one up on me there) bastard! im in canada fool! u dont know what i have learned up here man! i have learned the art of not doing anything offensive fool!!! dont make me pull out being ridiculously nice!!! u cant take that kid!

this is impotent

"in this setting of leisurely erotic stimulation without sexual intercourse, the penis erection will wax and wane. the husband will discover that once an erection is obtained, it will come back if it goes away." - chapter 8 'impotent husband' book 'intended for pleasure Sex technique and sexual fulfillment in Christian Marriage"

boy howdy thats good bathroom reading...its funny to see what they tell christians about sex, and the things they suppose they dont know. if anybody gets the chance sit down with this book for a good laugh. its quite impotent.

give me that old time oscar the grouch it good enough for me

If you wake up in the morning mean and grumpy
And you frown at ev'rybody that you see
If you like your oatmeal nice and cold and lumpy
Then you're a grouch like me

If you love it when it's wet and cold and raining
And the music that you like is all off key
If you're happiest whenever you're complaining
Then you're a grouch like me

If you hate it when your grandma kisses you
You know what? Well me, too!
If you love to see a garbage truck roll by
You know what? So do I!
And if you think a great big pile of trash is pretty
And that ice cream is yucchy as can be
If you can't stand a cuddly little kitty, then you're a grouch like me

If you hate it when your grandma kisses you
You know what? Well me, too!
If you love to see a garbage truck roll by
You know what? So do I!
And if you think a great big pile of trash is pretty
And that ice cream is yucchy as can be
If you can't stand a cuddly little kitty
And you'd like to chase her up the nearest tree
Then you can be pretty sure that you're a grouch like me

groodest site ever

Groody grood grood grood

shut it.

im a dick!
im so happy with life!
i think i might actually be able to accomplish something with my life!
and i am so happy! so fricken happy! i will be driving, and working and living, and in control! i can see the light at the end of the tunnel, and its not the bad light at the end of the bad tunnel!
do do do do do, munamanah! do do do do, munamanah! do do do do do do do do do do do, do do do do do, do, do, do, dododo

Me Ow

its so cute its vomitous, but honestly ive been feeling alot like this lately......

well.........

er well i think i just um got my orgasm for the week.

http://www.the-nextlevel.com/board/showthread.php?t=37093

its just too neat!

i love me, i love me not.

retards

he's a complicated man and no one understands him but his lucky grrl

Im done i did it!!
Tavius.....fuck yeah!
here to work his mother fuckin ass yeah!

thats my song.
but seriously i find that no matter what the sitution u can work urself through it,
if its ur ex-girlfriend trying to finish moving out of ur old house and on with her life (cut to bex, stachi and ethan movin out of the house)

or old friends on vacation (cut to justin and audra hangin out, out of town)

or new love's figuring out what they want with their life ( cut to ashley writing in her journal)

or me spendin painful hours at work overcoming my destructive side (cut to tavius in a security guard outfit, with a deep look on his face. as he's standing in a booze store with everyone running around stealing all the booze)

you have to find the happiness in the moment, to pull u through to the true happy moments......its the only thing that u can do to actually make u happy....
in moments like these i hear a little song in my head played on a piano.
it goes, buh bu bu bu ba bu ba buhh...... buh bu bu ba bu buh bunh buhhhhh.

he's the one they call doctor feel good.

alright this is my last lunch and i when i get back i have 1hour and 45 mins left.......im a whining pussy i know. but when i get back i will sing u a song to make it all better.

jesus walk with me

alright folks im half dead and feel like crap, but im over the hump, this is lunch and i got 5 hours left. might try savin urself.
"the only thing that i pray is that my feet dont fail me now"

everything good im gone, nervous and wasted thankfully

Hey everybody,
please pray for me tomorrow, or today if u will.
This Sat, or in 7 hours i have to do my last 12 hour shift. and its at a lonely boring store.......and i think all the 12 hour shifts i worked last week made me really sick.....i cant not show up tomorrow or call in sick, but im not sure if i can do it.........its a character flaw, but shit i dont want to do is really about impossible for me to do. my body, my mind all shuts down.......if i can make it tomorrow i will get to work only 6 hours shifts at a much better store for 6 days a week, which is brilliant and fuckin glorious. but i need all the help i can get...........serious. i need to be able to do this. if not my life is kinda fucked........and the part that sucks is i never know if im strong enough to beat myself.........

new home sweet home

this is home. the ocean is where we're from. here is one of the few places u can see the earth being ripped from the ocean. and understand how it started. and where we should be.
that looks like heaven to me

here i go again

so maybe i should stay out of the graphic design field.

gemini, cause i was bored

MUTABLE--Third sign of the Zodiac--AIR SIGN

May 22 to June 21

"One of the biggest problems for a you as a person born in Gemini to overcome is the dual mindedness given by the sign which encourages the changing of the mind, or decisions, large or small, with no apparent reason, either to themselves or to others, and thereby irritating, more than harming, other people. A Gemini will sometimes give you the shirt right off the back and, perhaps the next day, for no reason at all, will refuse to give you the time of day; this is how you got the reputation of being contentous and hard to get along with. Some of you Geminians love to stir up trouble and then go away and laugh about it. With all this odd behavior you will find as a Gemini you are loving and caring, almost maternal in your actions toward those who are down or in need. Geminians are very versatile. Mythologically, the heavenly twins known as Castor and Pollux divided their time between living on Earth and living in Heaven; this is indicative of a certain quality in you,the Geminian, the quality of being able to live in a pure abstract, or fantasy world and at the same time you will turn your hand to any task no matter how simple or hard.

You collect wit and knowledge where ever you find it, although it could be only surface knowledge or short lived. You are forever young with a playful and endearing personality; not wanting to spend much time alone, you will hunt up your fun and companions. You have a lively imagination and you are therefore one of the most creative of all the signs, be it in entertaining yourself or actually inventing something. You are a great juggler of people and/or situations and can keep a tricky issue up in the air until it looks like you will lose it all, then you appear in another place, still juggling. You have a great gift of gab and can talk your way out of almost everything, even to the point of making others doubt their very eyes. You may be prone to a touch of paranoia, looking over your shoulder and feeling that the world will find you out. Some of you should guard against being a chatterbox or telling other peoples secrets; learn to respect your own goals and dreams and realize that they are worth every minute spent to obtain them."

more fiona no one will read

" I was staring out the window
The whole time he was talking to me
It was a filthy pane of glass
I couldn't get a clear view

As he went on and on
It wasn't the outside world I could see
Just the filthy pane that I was looking throughBecause the fact in fact
Whatever’s in front of me is covering my view
So I can't see what I'm seeing in fact
I only see what I'm looking through

I had to break the window
It just had to be it was in my way
Better that I break the window
Then forget what I had to say

So again I've done the right thing
I was never worried about that
The answer's always been in clear view
But even when the window's clean
I still can't see for the fact
That when it's clean it's so clear
I can't tell what I'm looking through

So I had to break the window
It just had to be
Better that I break the window
Than him or her or me"

fiscally powerful

im sorry to everyone i dont have the energy to explain most of whats going on with me.....im not going off the deep end i promise. im dealin with shit. the shit i know is there, and as open as i am with most of u, the fact is in this sitution i know best for me. and i know better than anyone exactly where and what the shit is.....im so thankful that all of u have helped me so much....not just now but always. i would not be alive if not for the grace of Yaweh and his peeps. thanks for takin care of bexs like i couldnt and didnt and chose not to do. thanks mostly that u did it for her and not for me.
ur beautiful peeps. i dont have much else to say addressing anyone at the moment, and if u didnt know my blog usually aint pointed unless i say exacts, i just kinda rant, and until last week i didnt know anyone was reading it. and thanks to bens blog people are. which is cool. the point i guess?...oh yeah thanks ben for puttin everyone elses blog on ur page. i didnt know everyone else had started one....anywho, im gonna watch more scrubs before i should sleep, then finish my fuckin annoying 56 hour work week.

Sixpence explains somethings best and i mean this to everybody who reads this.

" So Im changing who I am
'cos what I am's not good
And I know you love me now
But I don't see why you should
and I don't see why you should
No I don't see why you should"

im no superman :)

i play chicken with myself.

for always doesn't seem as long as never.

"I remember thinking
I'll go on forever only knowing
I'll see you again"

"I remember thinking
Sometimes we walk
Sometimes we run away"

MOTHER OF FUCK!!!

okay so i know this does not give u any insight into my world and its been a few days since i posted (ill get back to being pretentious...er i mean deep soon) this is the scariest shit in the world......im not proof possitive its real, but if its an impersonation its the best one in the whole world....so good in fact i could not listen to it all the way through because my neck started doin that twitch thing and my head went with it.....i got a head ache then hit the stop button in fright..........this is not for the weak of ear drums...........it is indeed the scariest reading of "The Raven" ever. ever. ever.

http://www.ojai.net/swanson/theraven.htm

good times good times

"After 1,700 deaths, over 12,000 wounded and $200 billion spent, we believe it is time to have this debate and this discussion on this resolution," Rep. Walter Jones, R-North Carolina, said Thursday." - cnn

really!?!? really!?!? no shit u fuckin idiot. who the hell puts these people in power? oh wait us. then we must be the fuckin idiots who take this much death and pain and money before we realize that this was a dumb fuckin idea. its like someone just takes the brains of these people and replaces them with some sort of brick like goo.....well at least this smart, republican is standing up for whats right. wonder if he has helped us in desperate situations where the government needs to change something urgently important?.......

"Jones, a member of the House Armed Services Committee, is the same congressman who pushed for the House cafeteria to change the name of French fries to "freedom fries" after France opposed the U.S. drive to war." -CNN

GAW!! IDIOT!!!

"On Thursday he joined a bipartisan group of House members sponsoring a proposed bill calling on the administration to announce a plan for a U.S. withdrawal from Iraq by the year's end and for the withdrawal to begin by Oct. 1, 2006." - CNN

and who ever said politicians are slow? just a little death and destruction....thats all.

'Cause I chose to live life with a filthy mouth

"when your sleepy, you work on impulse, and are only
concerned with what you want or what you want to
hear come out of the other person"

i have no exuse

im an idiot.
i guess its done.......now to ask forgiveness.
but im gonna move on and this time not just by walkin.
but drivin.

"If there was a better way to go then it would find me
I can't help it the road just rolls out behind me
Be kind to me or treat me mean
I make the most of it I'm an extraordinary machine"-fiona apple "extraordinary machine"

so man its been a little more than 2 weeks.....and im sleepin......and eatin....barely drinkin or smokin (mostly the cost) my brain feels like its connected to my emotions again.....not a bad start....now lets see which way we roll on the hill from here. up is work.....lets see whats at the top, anybody ready for a good uphill trip? onward and upward!!!........now for that sleep thing......at least a few hours.

Can't get the sink off
He's been hanging round for days
Come like a comet
Suckered you but not your friends
One day he'll get to you
Teach you how to be a holy cow

You do it to yourself
You do
And that's what really hurts
Is you do it yourself
Just you
You and no-one else
You do it to yourself.

Don't get no sympathy
Hanging out the 15th floor
You've changed the locks 3 times
He still comes reeling through the door
And soon he'll get to you
Teach you how to get to purest hell.

You do it to yourself
You do
And that's what really hurts
Is you do it yourself
Just you
You and no-one else
You do it to yourself.

This is not about Love.

i am a little reckless at times
mostly because i am a wreck
ship wrecked on a cold rock
dirty socks and my back hurts to bad to bend down.
postureless, poserful, god they are beautiful.
and staring at pictures makes me wonder how love wavers.
what an image and whats 3d?
dreaming of me dreaming of u having nightmares about me.
all 3 are lonely. and im why.

" If you don't have a song
To sing you're okay
You know how to get along
Humming
Hmmm

If you don't have a date
Celebrate
Go out and sit on the lawn
And do nothing
'Cause it's just what you must do
Nobody does it anymore

No I don't believe in the wasting of time,
But I don't believe that I'm wasting mine

if you don't have a point to make
Don't sweat it
You'll make a sharp one being so kind
And I'd sure appreciate it
Everyone else's goal's to get big headed
Why should I follow that beat being that I'm
Better than fine" - fiona apple "waltz" extraordinary machine

Tavius in canada with coats on!

find urself a different place. dont care where.....go go go, mentally physically. go. ur dreams are not just fantasy. dont let them be. dont look back and hope look forward and do, do. tee hee.......er uh...back to being smart.....everybody who reads this should stop being old fuckers......u are old, stop lying to urself....its not gonna change or get better unless u do it right now, right fuckin now......ur responsibilities are a crutch for ur fear......all of these thoughts u think mean nothing without action, they are just thoughts, metaphors.....like politics, or compassion, or ethics....none of them mean shit if we arent doing anything and just blogging about them.....oh wait.....crap....im doing that.......phuck!!!........well ill see u again when i dont just have to bitch/blog about it.....

p.s. if u are gonna bitch at me on the comments at least dont do it without ur name.
ben. fucker......jewtard.....b/t/w where do i find the other piece for my xbox?......

fear is not the end of this

whoever said that "it is the worst to be lonely in a crowd" is a fuckin moron......its more lonely when u cant reach anyone else absolutely. in the room is a concept, a mental seperation created be u or others, when u are by yourself with no option is factual.....if in fact we dont see all concepts as fiction created in the mind to blahdee fuckin bla bla bla. anywho when u cannot reach anyone, or do not have the option in any laws of physics way, that is lonely.....the absolute physical scientific inability to do anything....... im not there but MAN wouldnt that such.....say u are on an island with all the food drink housing porn and such u would ever need to live but in no way could u actually be in contact with anyone.....dude would that guys life SUCK!!!! talk about lonely.....boy howdey.

qua

so this place is soooo fucking cold!!! it snowed yesterday......its fucking june!!! there is no god here.
if santa was a good loving man he would stop sending fucking cold artic winds from his warm cosy cabin in the north pole. jack ass.

okay

canada, invasion of privacy, sex, perfection, booze, 3 times the price, smokes of clorine, sam phillips, im fucked. and happy, temperature smokes out of my lungs. i havent forgot. i cant forget. death for growth. ungrown. must grow. perfection.

there just spies

does anyone feel like they are in a movie, and are they're slightly afriad this movie aint gonna end nothin but 'indie' .

ya know .....the one were the crappy thing happens to the main character no matter how much you want them to succeed...............ya know its not gonna work................but you hope.............
hope.........faith..........love.............i know these are all great.............but im not sure a single one makes me feel great..........and none can make me feel like the greatest......................and i saw sparks...........yeah............i saw sparks.